Retail Staff From Around The World Share Their Most Infuriating Stories

Retail Staff From Around The World Share Their Most Infuriating Stories

As if making minimum wage wasn't bad enough, retail workers also have to deal with jerk customers who think the whole world revolves around them. Don't believe me? The folks below will be happy to share their most infuriating customer stories. In fact, that's exactly what they've done.

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28. Six! Six! Six!

I was working in the shoe section of a retail store.

I was with a woman who was looking for a specific brand of shoe, in a certain color. All a sudden this man comes over and very rudely interrupts me.

He shows me a shoe and says, "I need this in a 6!"

I apologize to the first customer and say I'll be right back. Normally I would tell him to wait his turn, but she insisted she didn't mind and he was very forceful. I go over to that shoe and look, then let him know we don't have any 6 in that shoe at the moment. In one in ear and right out the other.

"I need a SIX! SIX! SIX!" Then he starts gesturing on his fingers the number six.

"There is no six."

"I NEED A SIX!" He's practically shouting now.

"No six, sorry." I say, then I turn and start walking away to get away from this conversation.

Believe it or not, he comes back and starts doing the same exact thing with another shoe. I don't know how to make it any clearer we don't have something. Some people seem to think chanting what they want just makes it appear. No matter how upset you get, it doesn't change what I freaking have and don't have.

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27. How did you keep your cool? I would have gone to jail

I’m standing against a merchandise wall, with my head turned, talking to a customer. I’m blind in my left eye, so when I was approached by another customer, I didn’t actually see them at first. I was also in the middle of a very busy store, and considering the fact that I was clearly engaged with someone, I really had no reason to assume the second customer was trying to get my attention.

That is, until homeboy reaches out, grabs the back of my plug in my stretched ear, and pulls the thing out!

Now, if you don’t know much about body modification, let me just tell you—do not do that, for so many reasons. Stretched ears are kinda gross to touch unless you’re gonna wash your hands after, and you never know how tightly the jewelry is wedged in there. This particular plug was loose, fortunately, but it’s entirely possible to rip someone’s earlobe doing that.

And all he does, in the calmest manner possible, is hand the jewelry back to me and ask, with a tone of mild curiosity at best, “Did that hurt?”

Honestly, it kinda broke my brain, and I just said “Yes.” He nodded, took a cable off the shelf next to me, and left.

People are wild.

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26. Pretty (rude) in pink

I used to work in clothing retail at a store that specialized in high quality basics in several different colors. We were approaching the holidays so the store released cashmere sweaters in pastels like blue, purple, and green. Punched into work, walked onto the busy sales floor, and was immediately approached by an older woman (OW) and her teenage daughter (TD).

OW: Do you have cashmere sweaters in pink?

ME: We might in the future but currently only carry them in a few colors at this time.

TD starts bawling. Loud WAILING sobs in the middle of the store.


ME: I'm sorry we don't carry them in that color right now, but we have wool sweaters in pink if you'd like.


At this point everyone in the store, staff and customers, are looking at us. Before I could even respond she marched out and tugged her sobbing teen behind her. I was so upset! What did she want me to do, knit a pink cashmere sweater right then and there?!

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25. I'm gonna beat you for helping me

A customer lost their phone at my work the other week. So one of my coworkers brought it to me and I put it in the office. A bit later the guy came looking for his phone so we went to get it and returned it.

All of a sudden he starts yelling at my co-workers about how we "stole" his phone, how his phone is off and it wasn't before and how we are sneaky people. So I was like... excuse me?! Dude you lost your phone and we returned it to you, that's it, that's all. He had a long freakout again and said he didn't lose it.

Then in walked his 6 huge male friends also starting to yell at us. So I told them to all get out because this is absolutely ridiculous. Told them about 5 times and they wouldn't leave. They then said "if you don't shut up we're going to beat the crap out of you." WHY?! Because I returned your stupid phone???

I then proceeded to call the police and of course they ended up running away. Was the most ridiculous thing I've ever experienced at work.

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24. The ice cream of the crop

"What kind of bakery only has Ice cream?!"

That's what an angry soccer mom just told me after returning her ice Cceam cake to my Ice Creamery that she had bought an hour before and somehow missed all my disclaimers about it melting, being made out of two layers of different ice cream, and having a white chocolate topper.

Apparently she only somehow noticed that my ice cream cake was made out of ice cream once it started to melt about an hour after buying it before returning to accuse me of false advertising for my ice cream store and not properly informing her that we were not in fact a bakery.

Gave her a refund in exchange for being very rudely told that she will never return.

What a loss! Don't let the door hit ya where the good lord split ya.

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23. You get the eye contact free of charge

I'm a cashier at a small grocery store, but sometimes I help out on the sales floor too. Today I was weighing and pricing peanut butter in our bulk department, when an elderly couple came into my aisle. The 60/70ish year old man was looking at some dried fruit, then turned to me and said, "Where are the bags?"

I pointed to the bags, which were right behind him. "Right there under the scale."

Without even glancing at them, he gives me an impatient look. "Well, can you get one??"

Let me be clear. I was about ten paces from where he was standing. The bags were immediately next to him, on the other side of him from me. He literally just has to turn slightly to grab a bag. But instead, he's looking at me like I'm an idiot.

So I drop everything I was working with onto my tub, walk over to him until we're basically face to face, and maintain a smile-less eye contact while I extend my arm and pick up a single bag for him. He takes it and just kind of scoffs and turns away.

I ended up taking my break right there to avoid having an aneurysm.

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22. The manager should have told this woman where to go

I stock and cashier at a store. So I'm putting feminine hygiene products and diapers up on a shelf. Out of the blue, a woman walks up to me and asks if I work there. I say yes and ask if I can help her with something. She gives me this look of disgust and walks off.

After a few minutes my manager walks up with the women in tow. My manager asks me to go stock another area. As I walk off, I hear the woman say, "Men should be touching women and children's stuff! Is he some kind of pervert because people like that shouldn't work around other people." I was in complete shock.

After the woman left, I went up to my manager and asked what her problem was. My manger said that the woman didn't believe a man should touch anything involving kids or women. A man's place is fixing stuff and working hard labor type jobs.

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21. I'm a customer so you have to be my friend!

So I work at a college campus in a store. This one regular comes in. She always talks my ear off and I try to be polite, but apparently she realized my disinterest. So she’s at the register. C is customer. Me is me

C: So there’s this guy, but I have a boyfriend- are you listening?

Me: Yes, ma'am.

C: I’m sorry for ruining your day.

Me: Sorry ma'am I just don’t do gossip while at work.

C: It’s not gossip.

Me: Would you like your receipt?

C: Sure.

She leaves and comes back and finds me while I’m stocking.

C: Do you have a problem with me? You’re always rude to me.

Me: No ma'am I'm so sorry. I didn’t mean to come off that way, thank you for bringing it to my attention.

C: Well, you’re being rude and you need to be nicer if you’re working here.

Me: I'm sorry ma'am

She leaves and comes back AGAIN and asks to speak to the manager who also has no time for her nonsense. Believe it or not, people: customer service employees don’t give a crap about your life.

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20. As American as frozen pie

I work in a grocery store as a superviser. I had a women come up to me today to complain about our Baker. We actually dont have a baker all our stuff is cooked, frozen and then delivered to us.

Customer - "Yes, hello, I'd like to complain about your baker."

Me -" Okay... what is the problem?"

Customer - "Well, I bought an apple pie here the other day and it wasn't very good. When I bit into it, the apples slices which should have been soft, were hard as if I bite into an actual apple."

Me - "Ma'am we actually don't have a baker, all of our stuff is pre cooked, then frozen before delivered. On the back of the box are the instructions to heat up the pie. You should have put it into the oven before eating it."

Customer - "If I had wanted to put a pie in the oven, I would have just made my own! Stupid."

She then proceeds to huff and walk away. My only thoughts were... "you just ate a frozen pie!"

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19. Literally crying over spilled milk

This happened to my co-worker last night. We'll call her C for cashier, DF for dumb freaking customer.

C: Very good, your total is $180, will you be needing help out to your car?

DF (hands C an auto-detailing service receipt for several hundreds of dollars): NO, I'm not paying because you owe me this!

C: Sorry, ma'am, I don't understand...?

DF: The last time I was here, YOUR gallon of milk broke inside my car, making me spend all this money getting it detailed and cleaned! So, you guys owe ME money for YOUR gallon of milk spilling all over the inside of my car! I'm not paying for these groceries because you OWE me!

C calls the manager, who tells DF no, sorry, we're not just giving her the groceries and while he (manager) is sorry the milk spilled, there's nothing we can do about it. DF starts swearing and walks off without the groceries.

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18. You're my servant!

This happened back in the late 90s when I was a teen working my first retail job at a popular department store.

The store closes at 9pm, there a numerous signs and announcements are made.

At 9pm, I vacuum my area and tidy up, then do a final walkthrough to make sure no customers are still in my area of the store. Seeing no one at 9:15 PM, I close my register and hand the money into the office. I notice I forgot my keys, so still clocked in I return to my register to get them. Of course there is a customer waiting at the register.

The customer wanted to see a pair of shoes. I told her the store was closed and the register was shut down, but I would be happy to get the shoes for her and if she liked them I would hold them for her until the next day.

"No, you are here to serve me."

I was caught off guard by this statement, but quickly responded with, "Only until 9pm. Since it is after that time, I am leaving."

I left the sales floor, told the manager, clocked out, and left.

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17. Doing her business while you're doing your business

I’m the kind of person where, if I gotta go, I gotta go.

I was heading off to the bathroom (we do not have a staff bathroom) to do my business. A customer must’ve seen me go in and she said “excuse me!” I responded saying that I’ll be with her in a second as I really had to use the toilet.

She followed me into the bathroom. After I sat down in a stall, she started to ask me questions about an item. It was really awkward to do my business with someone actively talking to me, let alone a stranger. I told her politely to please give me a minute because this is a violation of my privacy, and she’s being incredibly rude, and that I’ll be with her soon.

She stopped talking but remained in the bathroom. When I flushed and left the stall, she followed me while I went to the sink to wash my hands to ask her question again.

I gave up. She was really making me mad and I completely gave up. After I was done properly serving her, I called her a rude, stuck-up princess who lacks respect for anyone.

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16. This isn't a return; you're trying to sell stuff to me

I work at an arts and crafts store, and we have two main competitors. Yesterday I had a lady bring in two items from a competitor store in a competitor's plastic bag, with a receipt from said competitor. Then she tried to return it.

Lady: I just need to return, I didn’t use these.

Me: You didn’t buy these here, you bought them at competitor.

Lady: OH, well the competitor is all the way across town and I’m already here so can you return them?

Me: No, we don’t sell these items. We couldn’t take them from you. Even if we did sell these items, there would be no way for us to process a return for items you bought somewhere else.

Lady: Okay well can't you just return it this once?

Me: There is no possible way. Our system doesn’t process competitors purchases/returns.

Lady: FINE, I guess I will have to go over to competitor and take my business there.

You’re doing a return, that’s the opposite of business but okay . It amazes me how people can’t grasp such a basic concept.

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15. Call the steward, I guess

This woman was mad because she used all of her fuel points when she prepaid for gas, but she hung the pump up before the next person using her discount could pull up, which canceled the sale.

She argued with me for a minute because I have no way to change anything about someone's loyalty membership, it can only be fixed by going to the customer service desk (we're also a grocery store) and having a manager call and request a change from the company. But she kept insisting that I'm able to, I just choose not to.

Eventually she goes to leave and hits me with the classic: "I know your owner, they'll be hearing about you."

I just looked at her and was like "...we don't have an owner, we're union..."

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14. 44>46?

The store I work at was having a 20% off bedding and beds sale.

This lady brings up a few items and a throw. The throw wasn’t considered bedding. Her total comes up to $46.17. She argues with me that the throw should be considered bedding and on sale. Her logic makes sense to me, since it’s basically a blanket. I give her the 20% off.

Now her total is $44.17. The throw was $9.99 and 20% of that is $2.00. So now it’s $7.99.

She glares at me and says, “Why is it more than it was before?!”

I give her a simple explanation of how $44.17 isn’t more than $46.17 in the calmest voice I possess.

She still looks confused and had me re-ring her items to show what they were before I added the discount, then with the discount.

She looks embarrassed afterwards and leaves in a hurry with items, including her stupid discounted throw.

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13. Magic and unicorn farts

I just got to top off my Monday by arguing with an irate customer. Fun. My store installs television service. Most of our products are wired, but we have one product that is wireless. The wireless aspect is that it doesn't connect to a coaxial cable in the wall, the signal to the unit is sent wirelessly, and you are free to move the TV and unit anywhere within the home.

Enter customer who was up in arms because he was promised wireless and his box has wires. I checked his account and confirmed he had a wireless unit. He started yelling and telling me I am wrong. I showed him the unit on the sales floor when I get hit with a gem.

Irate customer points at the unit in triumph "SEE??!? THIS so called wireless box has wires!!!!" Yup. It has a power cord and an HDMI cord to connect to the television.

I explained to him what wireless meant in this case and the unit he had was indeed wireless. He demanded that we put in a truly wireless unit. I literally told him that the unit doesn't work off of magic and unicorn farts.

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12. That's sad, but what about my potatoes?

I work at a grocery store. Today, an employee in the meat department collapsed at 7am, right after the store opened. Someone working next to him flipped him over onto his back and started yelling his name and for help. He was unconscious, not breathing, and turning purple.

Someone from my team saw and immediately called 911 while he ran over to our coworker on the floor. He began doing CPR on him and didn’t stop until the EMTs arrived (4 minutes). The manager on duty ran over with the defibrillator right as the paramedics got there. They cut his shirt open and I saw him laying there, not breathing or moving, as they shoved tubes down his throat and began to push air into his lungs.

Meanwhile, a customer was impatiently demanding I get her a bunch sweet potatoes, completely oblivious to the man basically dead on the floor ten feet away from her.

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11. Getting into a bit of a pickle

When I worked at a grocery store, I was the one that would work the register later in the evening. Being that it wasn't a large chain store there was only three people in at the time.

Well, one night I was at the register and only one customer in the store. They didn't like the selection of some random food, I think it was rice. They were getting really mad at me because I was the one there in front of them. It comes to the point where they threw pickles at me and hit me in the face.

I was so angry but my manager saw it and came out to help. My manager was actually backing me up for once and is very upset with the customer. Manager asks me to go call the police since we have them on camera doing it. But before I step out to call, an off duty cop comes in and sees the customer with my manager. The off duty officer asks me if everything is okay I told her no the customer had assaulted me and we had it on camera.

She told me not to worry and she called one of her co-workers and he was there lickity split. They asked if I wanted to press charges, told him I do. Actually ended up going to court for it too (the case didn't go too far because it was cut and dry that they did it). 

Yes, this customer went to jail over a pickle.

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10. What do you mean it's not free?

So, I work in a charity shop (thrift shop, essentially, but the money raised goes to a charity), and I'd say at least three times a day people try to negotiate on the price of items or rip the tags off.

Anyway, we got a donation of some really cool art prints, about 30 in total, and I decided to put them out for $1 each (very reasonable, for what they are). That afternoon, a customer comes up to me holding the box, telling me he wants to take all of them. That's 29 prints at this point. So I tell him the price is $29. He then says, "I'll give you $10."

Although I get some pretty terrible offers for things this might be the worst. I say to him, "You want me to give you 19 items for free?"

"My friend is an artist, he can use these." I don't care if you use these to frame or as toilet paper sir, I'm not giving you a discount when the money goes to CHARITY.

I then said I couldn't do that and after a lot of back and forth where I just repeatedly said "no", he decided to swear at me and storm out.


9. You gotta love when another customer steps in

So this happened yesterday right before closing time. I work at a hardware store, and had just came in from my lunch. I walked over towards the paint area and hear this lady screaming like someone was dying.


She’s just screaming that to no one, just standing in the middle of the store. So I walk up and help her.

Me: Excuse ma’am do you need help?

C: Of course I do! I need x amount of paint.

Me: Alright, give me about ten minutes for all this.

She orders quite a bit of paint. Somewhere in the mix I messed up and gave her more than she asked for. My boss tells me to just discount it and let her take the whole thing. That’s fine with me; she gets out of here quicker and I don’t have to be yelled at.

While I’m standing there waiting for her to finish checking out, another gentleman comes up to me.

OG: Excuse me, sir. I have a question to ask you. I thought about just screaming 'help!' in the middle of the store but I’m not an idiot.

Then he just death stares at the First Lady. It took all I had to not bust out laughing. I answered his question and the First Lady tucked tail and scurried out without saying anything else.

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8. Turning water into paint

I work at a large orange colored hardware store chain. I get a lot of crazy returns like: bricks in drill boxes, rocks in lawnmower boxes, opened and used product, and some things that are just plain ridiculous. 

Just to explain:

MOD = The manager on duty

Tint = the stuff you put in paint to give it color

One day I got a return that was a 5 gallon bucket of paint. I go to open the bucket and it’s water. They guy returning it insisted that it was paint and that it was “defective.”

So I called the MOD and he came over and was like, “what’s the problem?” I explained “this guy is trying to return a bucket of paint and it’s water.” He then opens the bucket, conforms it’s water, and says to the customer ,“Well there’s the problem, you just haven’t mixed it. If you want we can take you over to the paint desk and have it mixed.”

To which the guy (not wanting to admit he’s wrong) hesitantly says “sure let’s do that.” So I watch as the MOD has the paint desk put tint in a bucket of water and mix it, all the while the customer is standing there with look of defeat. The customer eventually left with his bucket of colored water and was “satisfied.”

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7. My ID is pink

At work, I keep bright pink sticky notes with me. I doodle, keep notes, and honestly just fiddle with them to keep calm during our favorite problem-customers-meltdowns.

Today, I was helping a gentleman with a purchase that required showing his ID. I had already set the ID back down in front of him on the counter. The purchase was made, yet he kept staring down at me.

"I need my ID." he says, staring at my hands. In my hands were my clearly bright -pink- sticky notes. At first I was very confused and said,

"Yes sir, its right there," and nodded down at his ID. He didn't look down. His eyes clearly darted from my notes to my eyes.

"I see you holding it," he says.

Now, this customer had already been rude earlier. I was already at the level of "done with you". I looked from my brightly covered paper in my hands, up at him, back to my paper, back to him.

"Sir. Your ID is right down there if you look-"

"I -SEEEEEEE- it in your hands" he spits, putting emphasis on the word see. He was trying to mock me. But how do you feel mocked when you know they're 100% wrong?

I finally point as well, right at his ID . The one right in front of him. The one NOT in my hand. The one that is clearly not bright pink.

"Oh. there it is." He just grabs it and leaves. No 'I'm sorry', no 'oh I was confused', nothing.

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6. Why can't the dentist fix my car?

This just happened to me and my mind is blown by the stupidity of some people. See, I work as a pharmacy tech and this lady comes up to the register. I come up to her and ask if she was picking up a medication or dropping off a prescription. Here’s basically how it went down:

Lady: I need you to fix this for me. plops down a broken jewelled bracelet

Me: Ma’am, I don’t know how to fix broken jewelry, and we don’t fix jewelry here.

L: You guys used to do it though.

M: I’ve been here for a year and we’ve never had services like that. If we had one, you might want to ask someone in the front store for information.

L: Why can’t you help me?

M: I don’t know how to help you. I’m a pharmacy tech. I deal with medications not jewelry.

L: So you can’t fix it?

M: No, ma’am. I’m sorry, you’re at a pharmacy, not a jewelry store.

L: Well. That's not very good service. walks away

I stood there, baffled. I couldn’t quite believe what just went down. I don’t know. I just had to share this. I don’t know...

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5. A biting rebuke

My husband and I used to own a deli.

We had one customer that was would always order like this. "Four slices of thin cut turkey weighing exactly 100 grams."

It is possible but inevitably it would come out to 95 or 105 grams.She would always complain that it was too much or too little.

I was having a particularly bad day and wasn't up for the game of turkey bingo. My husband stepped up to help the woman and sure enough it came to 105 grams.

Like clockwork, she complained. So my husband looks at her, smiles, picks up her 4 slices of turkey, takes a bite puts it back down on the scale.

She didn't come back after that. We lost a customer but the frustration release was beautiful.

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4. How cheap can you possibly be?!

I work at a very small, busy store. We sell bags for 10¢, and have boxes if you forget to bring reusable bags. Some people bring in extra plastic bags they've stashed at home, and give them to us to disperse. Everything here is insanely cheap. Full cart of groceries for $30, cheap.

We got absolutely slammed after the holiday weekend, as we expected. It got so busy that we ran out of extra bags AND boxes, which usually doesn't happen.

One night I served an entire family of incredible mean jerks.

It came time to pay and pack their items. When I mentioned that we ran out of free bags and boxes, but have 10¢ bags available, the lady who did all the talking got furious. "I'll see about that!" as she stormed off to ask stockers.

In the meantime, one of the guys with her just asked for a few of the 10¢ bags and we packed up. She came back, rammed into a regular customer, and started barking at the guy who got the bags. 

My regular went "those people are rude" as I rang her up. I smiled real wide said "have a nice day!" She knew they ticked me off, too, and said "good luck!"

Then they called her a [bleep]. Stay classy.

I turned back around to see all a bunch of dog food  in their cart. "Hey you didn't pay for that," I said. "Oh. Thought we did." 

I'll give them the benefit of the doubt here, but they didn't even stop by the pet section. No way they thought they had paid for it.

Mean and thieving. Real charmers.

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3. Your prices literally make me sick

So I worked at a certain phone company as a “wireless consultant” which is basically just a cashier that can change your phone plan and take your money for accessories and what not. We had a strict policy where if you buy a phone case or something of the sort and want to return it, you have to pay a 25% restocking fee. People often got annoyed at this so we would have them sign a waiver on the receipt that says they understand this is a rule.

So this elderly woman comes in to return an item (don’t remember what exactly). I ring up her return and give her 75% of the price back to her.

Cue mental breakdown. She says “I never knew about that policy, that is stupid. I have been with this company for years and you should respect me.” I tell her to give me the receipt so I can look at it. On the back of the receipt it very plainly says in big words “there is a 25% restocking fee on all returned accessories.” Directly under that was her signature.

This escalated even worse and she began yelling and cussing and finally she looked me dead in the eyes and said “if you don’t give me all of my money back I’m going to throw up all over.” I tried to hold back my laughter but I couldn’t help but let the smallest smirk cross my face because of how ridiculous this situation was.

For context this item was maybe $35 new so we are talking like $8 here. 

She storms off and walks out the door. Not even 2 minutes later she comes steaming back in, slams her finger down her throat, and vomited all over the phone cases on the wall.

At this point I was stunned.

Me: Ma’am, please don’t throw up on the merchandise. I am going to call the police.

In response, she barfed some more.

Cops come, they honestly had a hard time believing what I said. They told me there wasn’t a whole lot they could do. Manager comes in from her off day and tells me to clean it up. I quit on the spot.

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2. Go ahead: say something about millennials, I dare you

I work in the electronics section of a popular department store. The town is largely populated by old/retired people, so I'm used to explaining technology in a simple-to-understand way.

I'm stocking shelves when I see an older man staring at cables and muttering to himself. I put on a smile, walk over, and do my whole “hello, how may I help you" thing.

Man: "I'm so sick and tired of needing so many cables to connect my technology. I have an iPad, a phone, and a computer and it's a pain to connect it all."

Me: "I completely understand sir, what kind of cabl-"

Him: "I have a [camera] and I want to connect it with my computer."

Me: "Oh, okay! No problem, sir, those kinds of cables are right over here."

Now, we have the USB-C and Micro-USB cables mixed in with each other, so I figure I should let him know which is which. I've done the same thing with plenty of other people and they were more than capable of figuring it out.

Me: "So, make sure when you're selecting your cable, it ha-"

Him: "These are too expensive."

Me: "Well, sir, this is the cheapest that these cables usually go for. Now, when you're selecting a cable, make sure it says 'micro-USB' on the box, like thi-"

Him: "I don't understand."

Me: "Well, sir, some of these are what are known as Micro-USB, which is what fits your camera. Some of these are USB-C, whi-"

Him: "What are you saying?!"

Me: "I understand the confusion, sir, the names are simila-"

Him: "No, I don't understand your terminology!"

Me: "Sir, I understand, but that's what I'm trying to expla-"

Him: "Clearly you don't understand people.” I'm a terrible worker, I'm out of touch, etc.

At this point, I realize he's going to refuse any kind of help, so I decide to take our cheapest cable, peel off the tape keeping it shut, and show him the end. He yanks the cable out of my hand as I'm in the middle of saying "Is this what you're looking for?” and starts walking towards the exit.

I chase after him, explaining that he needs the box in order to check out. He barks that he doesn't need it, finally grabbing it out of my hand when I restate that he needs a barcode if he intends to pay for it. He barks something about "teaching me how to work" as I sigh and go back to stocking boxes.

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1. Obit-u-ary: find out what it means to me

A lady walks in to my convenience store and walks directly over to the greeting cards. After about five minutes, she comes over and impatiently taps her foot behind the line up of people checking their lotto tickets. I finally get to her.

Her: Do you not sell obituaries here?

Me: Pardon?

Her: O-BIT-U-AR-IES. Do you not sell them here?

Me: Obituaries?

Her: rolling her eyes now Yes... obituaries..

Me: Ummm they’re printed in the newspaper. We sell the newspapers here.

Her: No. OBITUARIES. I’m looking for obituaries.

Me: Yes, to my knowledge those are printed in the paper, online, or available at the funeral home/funeral. No one sells obituaries. You were looking at cards. Did you mean sympathy cards?

Her: No, I mean obituaries. What kind of place is this? It’s not that hard to understand. I’m looking for obituaries.

Me: Well, I have no idea how to help you there..

Her: Alright. I am going to a funeral. I want to bring the family an obituary.

Me: I think you’re looking for a sympathy card.

Her: This is ridiculous. You’re being stupid. This is stupid. I’ll just go elsewhere.

And with that, she stormed out.

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